For Whom the Lead Pipe Tolls:

• Jim Carrey. Even when he manages to be funny, he needs to be killed.
• Oceania. Birthplace of our beloved leader, Jeff Vogel, this island paradise recently tore him from the lofty position of Vice-Presidente and pushed him into exile. And if we can't have them, nobody can. Protest the exile of Vice-Presidente Jeff Vogel on alt.culture.virtual.oceania today!
• The Spot. Man, these kids (and, more importantly, whatever corporate marketing army is actually funding such obviously contrived bullshit) need to die. On the other hand, Michelle will make a fine post-founding-of-the-First-American-Empire sexual-favors servicing device.