I think I will make dozens of copies of this one!!!!!

> ROMANTIC PINK SLIP
> Dear __________________________,
> I regret to inform you that you have been eliminated from further
> contention as Mr. Right.  As you are probably aware, the competition
> was exceedingly tough and dozens of well-qualified candidates such as
> yourself also failed to make the final cut.  I will, however, keep
> your name on file should an opening come available.  So that you may
> find better success in your future romantic endeavors, please allow me
> to offer the following reason(s) you were disqualified from the
> competition:
> (Check those that apply)
> __ Your last name is objectionable. I can't imagine taking it,
> hyphenating it, or subjecting my children to it.
> __ Your first name is objectionab! ! ! ! le. It' s j ust not something I can
> picture myself yelling out in a fit of passion.
> __ The fact that our finest dining experience to date has been at
> McDonald's reveals a thriftiness that I find unappealing.
> __ Your inadvertent admission that you "buy condoms by the truckload"
> indicates that you may be interested in me for something other than my
> personality.
> __ You failed the 20 Question Rule, i.e., I asked you 20 questions
> about yourself before you asked me more than one about myself.
> __ Your breasts are bigger than mine.
> __ Your legs are skinnier than mine. If you can FIT into my pants,
> then you can't GET into my pants.
> __ You're too short. Any son that we produced would inevitably be
> beaten up repeatedly at recess.
> __ You're too tall. I'm developing a chronic neck condition from
> trying to kiss you.
> __ The fact that your apartment has been condemned! ! ! ! reveal s a n
> inherent
> slovenliness that I fear is unbreakable.
> __ Although I do enjoy the X-Files, I find your wardrobe of Star Trek
> uniforms a little disconcerting.
> __ Your frequent references to your ex-girlfriend lead me to suspect
> that you are some sort of psychotic stalker.
> __ Your ability to belch the alphabet is not a trait that I am
> seeking
> in a long term partner.
> __ Your height is out of proportion to your weight.  If you should,
> however, happen to gain the necessary 17 vertical inches, please
> resubmit your application.
> __ The fact that you categorize the ProBowler's Tour as 'Must See TV'
> demonstrated that you do not meet my intelligence requirements.
> __ Somehow I doubt those condoms that I found in your overnight bag
> were really necessary for a successful business trip.
> __ I am out of your league; set your sights lower next time.
&g! ! ! ! t; Sinc ere ly,
>
>
> ____________________________
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