The East Campus Nerd Test
Posted to talk.bizarre by:
SKITCHEN@kcgl1.eng.ohio-state.edu (Kitchen Scott)
Check all boxes for which your answer is "yes".
The "submit" button is at the bottom.
Have you ever used a computer? If the answer is no, try taking the Baker House Purity Test.
Have you ever programmed a computer?
Have you ever built a computer?
Programmed a computer continuously for more than four hours?
Programmed a computer continuously for more than eight hours?
? (For those non-MIT students out there, this translates as, "Do/did you major in electrical engineering or computer science?)
Do you wear glasses?
Are your glasses broken (e.g. taped)?
Is your vision worse than 20/40?
Worse than 20/80?
Are you legally blind?
Have you ever asked a question in lecture?
Have you ever answered a question in lecture?
Have you ever corrected a professor?
Have you ever answered a rhetorical question?
Do you sit in the front row?
Do you take notes in more than one color?
Have you ever worn a calculator?
Do you read science fiction?
Have you ever used a microscope?
Have you ever used a telescope?
Have you ever used an oscilloscope?
Is your weight less than your IQ?
Have you ever programmed a computer on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday of the same weekend?
Have you ever programmed a computer past 4 am?
Have you ever programmed a computer with someone of the appropriate (either or both, your choice) sex (besides your consultant)?
Have you ever programmed a computer for money?
Do you have a Rubik's Cube?
Can you solve it?
Without the book?
Do you have acne?
Do you have greasy hair?
Are you unaware of it?
Have you ever bought anything from Radio Shack?
Do you know trigonometry?
Do you know calculus?
Do you know Maxwell's Equations?
Do you have them on a t-shirt?
Have you ever dissected anything?
Do you know pi past five decimal places?
Do you know e past five decimal places?
Do you own more than $500 in electronics (excluding stereo)?
More than $1000?
More than $2500?
Have you ever built more than $2500 worth of electronics?
Have you ever watched Dr. Who?
More than three times in the same night?
Have you ever read
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
Was your SAT math score more than 300 points higher than your verbal?
Have you ever done homework on a Friday night?
Have you ever pulled an all-nighter?
Have you ever redesigned a major household appliance?
Have you ever played a computer game?
Played a computer game in the last three months?
Played a computer game in the last three weeks?
Have you ever written a computer game?
Are your pants too short?
Do your socks mismatch?
Have you used a chemistry set?
After the age of 13?
Have you ever played D&D (or any other role-playing game)?
Since high school?
Have you ever entered a science fair?
Did you win?
Do you own a digital watch?
Does it play music?
Does it have a calculator?
Have you ever used a rare earth element?
Do you own a CRC?
Do you own a CRT?
Do you know RPN?
Do you own a laser (over 1 mw)?
Were you ever on a chess team?
A debate team?
Do you know more than three programming languages?
More than eight?
Have you ever made a technical joke?
Did no one get it?
Can you name more than ten Star Trek episodes?
Are you socially inept?
Do you own a pencil case?
Do you wear it?
Do you know Schrodinger's Equation?
Have you ever solved it?
Have you ever used the word "asymptotic"?
Can you count in binary?
Have you ever broken into a computer system?
A government system?
Have you ever changed your bank account?
Changed someone else's?
Changed someone else's bank account for money?
Have you ever inhaled helium?
Do you know the Latin name for the fruit fly?
Do you own anything that is radio controlled?
Have you ever interpolated?
Have you ever extrapolated?
Have you ever used a modem?
Have you ever reached sexual climax while programming a computer?
No direct correlation has been found between this test, and the "normal" (sex) purity tests, though an inverse relationship is suspected.