[HMBHS] Why Lawyers Should Never Ask Certain Questions

Parri Adjoodani padjoodani at hotmail.com
Fri Oct 15 10:27:07 PDT 2004


>>
>>  Why Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't 
>>prepared
>>  for the answer:
>>
>>  In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his first
>>  witness to the stand-a-grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her
>>  and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
>>
>>  She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've know you 
>>since
>>  you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to
>>  me.  You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk 
>>about
>>  them behind their backs.  You think you're a big shot when you haven't 
>>the
>>  brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit
>>  paper pusher. Yes, I know you.
>>
>>  The Lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across 
>>the
>>  room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
>>
>>  She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
>>  youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He
>>  can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is 
>>one
>>  of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife
>>  with three different women, one of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."
>>
>>  The defense attorney almost died.
>>
>>  The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very 
>>quiet
>>  voice, said, "If either of you bastards asks that bitch if she knows me,
>>  I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for contempt."
>>
>>
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>>
>

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